Quiet

This week has been rather idyllic, though quite contemplative for me. Though few things have happened in this week, the monthly staff and helpers' 3 day fast and pray, and even a wedding; these events really brought me into a time of contemplation and silent meditation. And through this time of just silent thinking I've come to multiple conclusions and many of them are, of course; dealing with myself.

During the 3 days of fasting and praying, I've received once again another breakthrough of strength well needed from Elohim. In all honesty, fasting should be like this, walking in the strength of Yahweh and not succumbing to the weakness of the flesh, no matter how tempting it may be. But that doesn't exclude me from every now and again stumbling at the same stumbling block. To me, I've realised that this war cannot be won through the complete destruction of the enemy, that is the spoil of the war, the treasure awaiting. The real victory comes through attrition because now I see that many of the young people have begun to experience shakings and turmoils in their lives that they begin to question their being here in the first place. Their conviction is beginning to waver and I find that just means their foundation is unsure upon the gospel of Messiah. What we need most right now is not to get rid of our enemies but to learn through the waging of war against them how to endure and become stout hearted.

[Jdg 3:1-2, 4] Now these are the nations which יהוה left, to prove Israel by them, even as many of Israel as had not known all the wars of Canaan; Only that the generations of the children of Israel might know, to teach them war, at the least such as before knew nothing thereof; And they were to prove Israel by them, to know whether they would hearken unto the commandments of יהוה, which He commanded their fathers by the hand of Moses.

We know how to pray, how to worship, how to war, but we don't really know how to endure. The littlest of things slip us up and causes offense to come in. We as the young people, myself included; don't know our end. We think we know so much and yet time and time again we've been proved wrong. And when we are wrong we do not want to learn from it but rather gloat over it. Nevertheless, Yahweh is merciful in that He will not stop teaching us until we either learn or become to stony hearted to continue learning. To whom He loves He chastises that they may bear peaceable fruits into righteousness in Elohim.

[Heb 12:11] Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.

Another thing that I've been so reminded of recently is that truly it is about Yeshua. Without Him we can do nothing and are nothing and yet many times we do so many things without Him and attribute the success of it to ourselves. Life is about Yeshua, everything is about Yeshua. Without Him then we will all be lost already. I've been reminded time and time again that before Him I have nothing to hold my head up high before. Because He causes me to see that it was and is He who makes me ride the high hills and without Him, I become submerged in the depths. He has shown me plenty in this week that I am all I am now because of Him alone. If I were to take charge of my own course then I would surely perish, but I am here now though not perfect yet but being perfected, because of Him. I don't know how to be more precise, Yeshua Messiah is all in all.

[1Co 8:6] But to us there is but one Elohim, the Father, of Whom are all things, and we in Him; and one Master Yeshua the Messiah, by whom are all things, and we by Him.

[Eph 4:5-6] One Master, one faith, one baptism, One Elohim and Father of all, Who is above all, and through all, and in you all.

I would not be here in this present time without Yeshua.

Another thing that Elohim has really been speaking to me about is about entering into the stillness of His presence where it's only Him and me. I found that time of quiet meditation is very needful even for someone like myself. It doesn't exactly have to be quiet, it just has to be Yeshua and me. Whether by myself, on the road or even in the bathroom I begin to find where I can be with Him where He is I can be myself. Everything of myself can just come out and I can freely voice myself to the Highest Who answers those who call upon Him. Whether my issues, my needs, my struggles, my desires, or even that of others I can just bring it all before Him knowing that surely He will help. Thus, I found that this particular week where no one really talked much with me proved to be time where I can just be with Elohim. Very, very nice. Although, it is also in His presence that the nastier side of things tend to surface as well. The deep, well kept secrets all I can freely surface it before Yeshua Who cleanses away all my sin with His blood. And blows, blows cleanse away deep evils.

It's in the time of quietness I can wrestle with Elohim in the sense that what I desire is contended against what Elohim requires of me. And always I find that though I may sometimes not like it, to say I don't enjoy it would be a lie. Because I simply benefit so much by having so much of the burden removed from me.

Though we may find trouble and sorrow, unlike the world we can call upon the name of Yeshua and He saves us. We then can return unto the rest of our souls because Yahweh deals bountifully with us.

-Sunday, 21st May 2017, 1 year 8 months 14 days, 2146