Grace

During the overnight once again I was going through something. I had felt that my sins had caught up with me and I just felt one kind, I didn't really have the heart to worship that night. Yes, I realise what the Word of Elohim says and speaks of, that anyone in Messiah is a new creation and old things have passed away. That there's no more condemnation to those in Messiah Yeshua who do not walk according to the flesh but the Spirit. I realised all these but yet the feeling persisted and persisted and I couldn't shake that uneasiness forming within me. But as I worshipped especially for the song John 4:23-24 the Holy Spirit once again spoke and ministered to me. As I was feeling weighed down by my own thoughts and mistakes He spoke clearly to me. "I didn't choose you to worship and serve Me because you were able to. I am the One Who makes you able to worship and serve Me. I don't choose the qualified, I qualify those I have chosen." 

It wasn't an audible voice by the way, but a clear cut of His Word in my spirit that I knew without a doubt that it was the Lord Yeshua Who had spoken to me just now. When He told me that gradually I felt as though wave after wave of His presence just coming upon me and cleansing me from all my thoughts and my sins. As I began to worship more I felt more and more released and set free and as we sang in the Spirit after John 4 I just felt so grateful and humbled that Yahweh would choose someone like me to be able to worship and serve Him all the days of my life. I felt that giving my entire life to Him was but the least that I could do for all that He has done for me. And He gave me this Word as well: 

1 Corinthians 1:27-31

[27] But Elohim has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and Elohim has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty;

[28] and the base things of the world and the things which are despised Elohim has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are,

[29] that no flesh should glory in His presence.

[30] But of Him you are in Messiah Yeshua, who became for us wisdom from Elohim—and righteousness and sanctification and redemption—

[31] that, as it is written, “He who glories, let him glory in YAHWEH.”

And when I received that word from Him I realised that He is right and just in all that He says and does. I am so humbled that despite all my flaws, the areas in my life that I still need a breakthrough yet He would still choose me and cause me to draw near to Himself by the blood of Yeshua. That despite all that I am, I can still stand in His presence with the hosts of heaven by His grace, mercy, and love towards me. At that point in time I am glad that I had chosen to serve the Most High, there's really no greater pleasure or place to go besides. Praise Yahweh for the breakthrough and for His Holy Spirit always with us in whatsoever we go through. 

-Saturday, 12th December 2020, 5 years 3 months 5 days, 1414