Tuesday

Apparently my day off has officially been switched from every Wednesday to every Tuesday now and I must say it is quite the feeling to be able to be available for most of the day. I can catch up on my sleep, and I think that's about what I normally use my day offs for anyways.

This also gives me time to quietly reflect on the road that I have thus far walked by the guiding and the teaching of the Holy Spirit in me. More often times than not I find that it is during this times of availability that time begins to move ever so quickly. The next thing you know it, it's already evening. I really do enjoy the days where I get to just be free around town, and frankly even the work that is being given unto me to do and to carry out is always quite free and easy. It's been the same work ever since I joined this ministry to serve, but it has become lighter and lighter everytime. I believe it has to do with the renewing of the mind. And of course, the best way to renew the mind is by the art of worship.

[Rom 12:1-2] I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of יהוה, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto יהוה, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of יהוה.

I've mentioned in a previous post of how this verse not only speaks about separation but also the surrendering of one's entire being during worship to be offered up like incense, a pure offering. Worship is about giving one's all every single time as much as prayer is the same as well. Peter said that they, and in like manner we; must continually give ourselves to prayer and the Word.

[Act 6:4] But we will give ourselves continually to prayer, and to the ministry of the word.

That means an act of total submission to allow prayer, worship, and even the ministering to Yahweh by His Word to take effect in our lives. That is how we will see life transformed, characters changed, minds renewed. However, more on worship and prayer it doesn't come only during services or even during personal closet times. It comes at every single moment because Yahweh has declared that from sunrise to sunset, practically every single time; His name is to be great and extolled.

[Mal 1:11] For from the rising of the sun even unto the going down of the same my name shall be great among the Gentiles; and in every place incense shall be offered unto my name, and a pure offering: for my name shall be great among the heathen, saith יהוה of hosts.

Every moment there is something to worship Yahweh about, everywhere and everything if you can see speaks of the glory of Yahweh and declares His works.

[Psa 19:1-3] The heavens declare the glory of Elohim; and the firmameint sheweth his handywork. Day unto day uttereth speech, and night unto night sheweth knowledge. There is no speech nor language, where their voice is not heard.

At the same time, my personal conviction stands that prayer is not just mouthing off a set phrase of words or sentences, but instead prayer is about communion to Yahweh. Much like how worship is about exalting the name of Yeshua, to me prayer is the time when my heart can be poured out before Him in a different manner. To voice out my needs, my weaknesses and His ability not just to meet them but exceedingly and abundantly so. Worship is about Him and for me, prayer is about a coming together to meet with Him.

Prayer needn't be long winded because as how one talks to a friend can be blunt and honest, so too ought we be before Yahweh because we have that privilege. True, He is to be revered and worshipped always in a manner befitting because He is Yahweh El Shaddai, but He is also our Heavenly Father Who hears the heartfelt cries of His sons and daughters and will not turn them away. In prayer when I am alone I can be brutally honest with Elohim as how I can be with Him only. But of course, this is just my standing on this matter.

It's been a great day off so far for me, simply because I was able to catch up on some sleep that I had been slightly behind for these few days. However, even as it draws to a close in a few hours time it doesn't really matter to me. In fact, if anyone needed to call for help I would immediately answer because sleep can always be replaced later on and most obviously, those who serve Yahweh have realistically, no day offs from such things. Our days down to the last seconds are from start to finish His alone. We have nothing of our own selves to add and even when we continue to serve Him we needn't be tired because we can always be refreshed in His presence, more so during worship and prayer which I myself have had the privilege of experiencing on many, many, many occasions. Without that refreshing everytime, I'd think I'd be half asleep through all the services and whatnot. Praise Yahweh for today, and even then tomorrow shall yet be better.

-Tuesday, 28th march 2017, 1 year 6 months 21 days, 1619

Oppressed and Delivered

In the end, we still have so much to learn from the Holy Spirit, from one another. I keep getting reminded again and again that the Elohim that I serve and worship will always use unconventional means to get across to me His Word. Be it circumstance or people or even timely locations and whatnot, everything and everyone has a Word for me for the season. And now I keep realising that I still have much of myself remaining in me. So much pride, so much of the self that sometimes it really vexes me greatly. However, I do believe that in this time Yahweh is doing something I have always asked but never seem to come to the full comprehension of it until it is too late. Break me.

The breaking has begun and it is not pretty. When a shelter is broken the pests scurry away and are exposed. When a vase is broken then its contents are revealed for all to see. And even now I believe that this is beginning not just for myself but even for the rest of us young people as well. Elohim knows that we have need for it simply because we are too proud to ask for it ourselves. And the cracks are beginning to emerge, little areas in the life are being magnified to the extent that what could be easily overlooked is now in plain sight. And it is good for each of us to go through a time of shaking. It simply means that we have yet need to cling onto Yeshua all the more because we see the fault lies within ourselves. We need Him much more than He would need us, in fact there is nothing we can add or contribute to His greatness really. Before Him we are nothing and yet without Him we are worse off than nothing. How odd and still this is the situation that I do desire Yahweh to cause me to see.

This indeed is the time for Elohim to arise and when He arises everything scatters away. None dare stand before His presence and much more now that He has arisen over us, His people; we find that whether we like it or not, we are coming to an end of everything we once knew and held onto. Only the Word will remain but until and even during the time of the shakings, will we be shaken upwards or shaken asunder by it all? There is nothing that we can do but to hold onto our Rock which is higher than us and to go through the tempest together with Him. Doubtless He will not wait for us if we falter, His will must be done after all and yet in His graciousness towards us He still waits for us. But even so there will be an end to just how patient our Elohim will be to someone who is unwilling to change according to the working of His Spirit.

This is the second part. I had a brief respite during the Friday overnight prayer to gather my thoughts and settle any lingering, unwanted debts left unpaid between me and Elohim and I must say I am feeling completely set free once again. Sometimes, we tend to stall our time to overcome simply because we actually don't want to overcome. As I was under oppression, never have I felt completely justified of myself except when in that moment of time. Surely I am in the right, not they. They ought to be the ones to reconcile and not me, I have done nothing to do so. Such pride and arrogance I hold in me now that the time has past for it. Looking back, it was such a bitter sweet feeling holding onto said oppression. It is to my own hurt, true; however it just felt so good and right that I found it so hard to let it go. However, as every confrontation with the Holy Spirit goes; you either submit or lose yourself in the Way. And the pride of life most certainly does not want to submit.

In the end, we must continue onwards whether we feel like it or not because the will of Elohim for each generation has and will always be accomplished, whether or not we will be there to witness it first hand. Though He is gracious unto us, He will not wait on us; we are the ones that wait on Him and follow Him wherever His Spirit takes us to. Even if it means the valley of the shadow of death. However, as we continue onwards we are given the promise that with each step forward we take is one step closer to Yeshua Messiah and one step onwards in the fulfillment of the Divine will of Elohim in our lives. There is no time to be stuck in speed bumps, as much as it hurts we must continue forward with Messiah because we have no choice. The world's perishing and the only Way to life is first through the death of ourselves on the cross. And what a painful death it shall be before we experience the unsearchable riches of Messiah Yeshua for ourselves.

-Saturday, 25th March 2017, 1 year 6 months 18 days, 0549

Welcoming Change

Everyone is beginning to change. It's not just everyone, but everything in regards to the works of Yahweh. I can see clearly that everyone is not the same as they were months prior and although subtly, change is beginning to occur ever more frequently. Frankly, that is something to rejoice over simply because it means that there is progression in our walks with Elohim and Messiah. If nothing changes, everything is at standstill and standing still and not continuing is most certainly a dangerous notion. Yahweh has His own plan and purpose for each of us and yet Yahweh waits for not a soul, we in fact wait for Him as a servant waits for the Master or a son his father.

Job once said something I found quite interesting, pretty much summing up a Christian's life in one sentence:

[Job 10:17b] Changes and war are against me,

In the New King James Bible, it says that changes and war are ever with me and I find that to be ever so true. We are always reminded that we are in a constant state of warfare with the enemy. As long as we are in this world, we are at war with the enemy of our soul, our fleshly ways and corruptible character traits. So long as we are in this tent we are at war and when war comes then also comes change. In fact, I realise when we walk with Yahweh we cannot hope but to change as we continue to press onwards with Him.

Change is not something to shun away from but to embrace because whether good or bad, changes tells us of our current situations and where exactly do we stand amidst it all. Is our walk aright with Messiah Yeshua? Or is our walk slowly coming to a halt and sliding backwards ever so slightly? In all this there is a change, whether of the renewing of the mind, the improvement of one's character, the peace of having one's burden removed or otherwise; no one having walk with Elohim does not change. Peter was changed, John was changed, everyone who ever met with Yeshua was changed.

[Act 4:13] Now when they saw the boldness of Kepha and John, and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men, they marvelled; and they took knowledge of them, that they had been with Yeshua.

[Luk 19:8] And Zacchehu stood, and said unto Yeshua; Behold, Rabbi, the half of my goods I give to the poor; and if I have taken any thing from any man by false accusation, I restore him fourfold.

Change I believe, is a mark of a Christian. We are called after all to move from glory to glory, from faith to faith, and from strength to strength. And it is in this time that I am beginning to see change, whether for good or for bad I do not know but change nonetheless. Everyone is changing now and it amazes me to see the working of the Holy Spirit in each of our lives individually and corporately. We might tend to butt heads every now and then but together we are being built for a eternal household of Elohim. That is once again, something to give thanks about. Praise Yahweh for that.

[1Pe 2:5] Ye also, as lively stones, are built up a spiritual house, an holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices, acceptable to יהוה by Yeshua the Messiah.

Anyways, for me the future appears uncertain. But then again, I'm not one to really rely on all these things like planning ahead; though I do plan many a times. In the end, what Yahweh does in the moment is better, far better than what I had planned and envisioned. He lights my path so that I see not the end of the tunnel but just the step ahead.

[Pro 16:9] A man's heart deviseth his way: but יהוה directeth his steps.

Everyday is not mine but Yeshua's because as I live is no longer I but Messiah in me Who lives and gives me new being. How exciting it is to be able to live the days of the Lord.

[Psa 74:16] The day is Thine, the night also is Thine: Thou hast prepared the light and the sun.

-Monday, 20th March 2017, 1 year 6 months 13 days, 2320

Sharper

In the end, I find that what is coming next on my part is most certainly interesting. I have become involved with the transcribing of Pastor Jean's new book and as such I am asked to transcribe word for word everything that she has said. That has got me thinking really good. But more than that this has got me really excited.

It's not even a week into it and already I have received advice from my sister that I didn't want to hear. Then again, it is all just a bit of murmuring and grumbling on my part so this particular paragraph should be left out. But then again...

Sigh, I really love my sister but we tend to butt heads more often than not and that really causes me to ponder everytime whether or not she is doing well or no. Not to say that we don't have times where we were like chums but in the end we tend to be at two different polarities with each other. But of course you know what they say:

[Pro 27:17] Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.

I think this verse has been misquoted for so long. People, whenever they get into arguments or disputes with one another just love to quote this verse but they don't realise what it really means. When iron sharpens iron both edges become sharper, refined, and easier to cut with. And that has been likened to us as well. We are of the same pedigree in the sense that we as sons, brothers and sisters in Messiah ought to sharpen one another and not just find time to use this verse to justify our arguments.

[1Pe 2:5] Ye also, as lively stones, are built up a spiritual house, an holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices, acceptable to יהוה by Yeshua the Messiah.

With all our different opinions and whatnot then we ought to come out of it sharper and sharper still. Not using our edge to cut one another but to become more refined in the Word of Elohim and with our walk with Yahweh. Offense arise simply because we have yet to learn how to see the benefits of sometimes people not on the same wavelength with one another.

I remember that Caleb once said to me that though we are in the same ministry, each of us have differing convictions and personal beliefs. In reality we don't have to necessarily agree with one another on all things. Which I found I agreed to because that had been the case for me with many things that I have witnessed and have been taught thus far. Not to promote insubordination or clashing ideals. But simply I believe that as long as we are still in the physically corrupted flesh of a tent there will be a hindrance to the peace and unity we long for in Messiah. However all these differences make up an intricate and unique combination, each having a distinct but equal part to play. We are all one body but having many different parts and organs performing differing tasks. The eye cannot do what hands can and vice versa.

So in truth, it is good that we have our differences in views and opinions on certain matters. This means we have much to learn from one another and can benefit greatly. Only sometimes this leads to many a debates and disputes; most of which ends us with people being offended and apprehensive with one another. But in reality we ought to grow with one another, pushing one another and sharpening one another. Just like how iron sharpens iron and makes it all the more better, with every confrontation of sorts we ought to become more resilient, efficient, and cohabitate​ with one another more so.

-Friday, 17th March 2017, 1 year 6 months 10 days, 0354

Our Generation's Solution

Worship. That's the answer to offenses, whether it is to overcome them or even the offense of it itself leading to worship unto Elohim. Though Moses and Jonah failed in that regard because they simply took on the offense without any reconciliation, David and Job overcame that particular trial. David when he was denied the privilege to build the house for Yahweh to dwell in did not take up offense at it but rather instead chose to dwell on the goodness that Yahweh had accomplished in his life and his family's. In every right He was denied the thing that he desired most however he was a man of worship. He did what he had been taught and lived out, he worshipped his Elohim and that in turn gave him gladness of heart over angst of soul.

[2Sa 7:17-18] According to all these words, and according to all this vision, so did Nathan speak unto David. Then went king David in, and sat before יהוה, and he said, Who am I, O Sovereign יהוה? and what is my house, that Thou hast brought me hitherto?

[2Sa 7:25] And now, O יהוה Elohim, the word that Thou hast spoken concerning Thy servant, and concerning his house, establish it for ever, and do as Thou hast said.

It is said that in order to overcome offenses one needs to humble himself because in the end, offense deals with the pride of life. We only get offended because we don't like what the other party has to say about us, our doings, our character. Even if it is for our own good and edification in the end, the majority of situations leaves us offended at many things. One of the ways to overcome offense and even to cultivate not taking offense is to build a life around worship. David was a man of worship, Job as well. He worshipped regularly and continually.

[Job 1:5] And it was so, when the days of their feasting were gone about, that Job sent and sanctified them, and rose up early in the morning, and offered burnt offerings according to the number of them all: for Job said, It may be that my sons have sinned and cursed Elohim in their hearts. Thus did Job continually.

In the end when the time came for his fiery trial, he stood fast and held onto his integrity. Considering all that Job went through it is not a long shot to call his ordeal the most intense of them all besides what Yeshua went through. Noah waited patiently amidst mocking for 100 years, Abraham waited 25 years for his promised son Isaac. If we were to compare the length of the time patiently endured surely they would be much more appropriate. However they had family and friends to support them in their times of need. They had a community in which they could encourage and build each other up. However Job lost all of it and all that was left was just his wife who told him to curse Elohim and then die. But in the end, when there was nothing left he still had his Redeemer and thus he worshipped because he realised that there is no other option left but to worship Yahweh. He had every right to be offended at everything and everyone but he chose the better part, the part of worshipping Yahweh.

[Job 1:20] Then Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped,

[Job 19:25-26] For I know that my Redeemer liveth, and that He shall stand at the latter day upon the earth: And though after my skin worms destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see Elohim:

Worship is beautiful, praise is beautiful. The many who composed together the book of Psalms said thus. Because worship is a form of humbling oneself. When we turn our eyes away from our troubles and offenses brewing and instead bring ourselves before Yeshua Messiah and worship Him it is an act of humility. When we stop looking at our problems and a way out and just look unto Yeshua, the Author and Perfector of our faith. I have seen so many times where even I have tried to rectify situations only to have them spiral out of control even more so. However when I stopped and worshipped Yahweh, believing in Him to be my Redeemer and Deliverer then it is then when things begin to change. Thus it leads up to Romans 12:

[Rom 12:1-2] I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of יהוה, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto יהוה, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of יהוה.

We are called not just to be set apart unto Elohim but even to be living sacrifices of worship and praise unto Him as well. When one speaks of sacrifice one must certainly refers to the Old Testaments art of sacrifice. To them sacrifice is worship unto Yahweh. And that is exactly what we are called to be. To be offered up unto Him as a living sacrifice, as though burnt up but alive unto Him through Yeshua Messiah. In the book of Leviticus, the burnt offerings speaks, at least to me; about the attitude that Yahweh desires from His people when we come to worship Him.

Firstly, the offering that the children of Israel brought is first of a willing heart. That is the sort of heart He requires of us even now. We ought not to come to Him to worship because we 'need' to but because we want and desire to. There is a difference with being forced to worship when you don't want to and finding pleasure in worshipping despite inconveniences. The entire flow changes just because of that. The offering is also of the finest quality, without spot or blemish or stripes. The same is with us, when we come to Yahweh to worship it must be the best simply because He is worthy of the best of all. All the best belongs to Him and then the rest to us.

Secondly, the burnt offering is offered entirely unto Yahweh alone. When the offerings are being sacrificed, a portion is always kept back for the priests and Levites. However only the burnt offering is entirely given unto Yahweh as a sweet aroma unto Him. What more us even now, how long have we withheld ourselves from completely worshipping Yeshua in spirit and in truth? Have we kept back a portion of ourselves in offering it to Yahweh?

There are actually many more things that I have yet to glean and to learn, however I am still lacking in many regards. That is not to say that I know what I say everytime but in the end what keeps me going is the sure mercies of Elohim in my life. Surely without Him I would have been confounded, offended, and cast off by now. Praise Yahweh.

-Sunday, 12th March 2017, 1 year 6 months 5 days, 1835

Our Generation's Sin

Just last week I had a chitchat with my friend, David Huan. You know, just talking about things here and there but I remember that during our conversation I said two things that seem entirely different in context to each other but in the end relates much more than I thought at that time. The first thing I said, 'The biggest issue of us young people is not others or temptations but rather offenses. That is the single biggest issue unresolved to date.' Secondly, 'There's a different meaning in Romans 12. Not just talking about separation but worship as well.' I had no idea that on that same day I received a revelation concerning these things and it really just astounded me so. I praise Yahweh for giving me yet another breakthrough. Although sometimes it is easier said than lived out...

This really excites me because this is exactly what has been going on in my personal walk recently. Concurrently we are once again in a new season with Elohim and it appeared that this time the season encircles around persecution, namely trials and tribulations already present and still to come. Many of our youth have been praying unto Yahweh for the preparation needed to face the coming challenges but in all this I see that we are severely lacking. Offenses really cause quite the stirring amongst us so much so that something that pinches causes an overreaction. I remember talking with Pastor Jean once and she corrected me on how to properly set up the chairs in order. It wasn't in any nasty lingo but just a gentle reminder and soon after I have scores of people asking me if I'm okay. Why? Because I was rebuked. When?!! A rebuke according to a dictionary is an expression of sharp disapproval or criticism because of someone's actions or behaviour. I have been meet with proper rebukes before and they cut deep. Then again, the Bible makes it abundantly clear that it is for my benefit rebukes come:

[Pro 20:30] The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly.

However that is not the point I'm trying to make here. What I'm saying is that, and this is my conviction in the matter; no matter how much we prepare for persecution we will not be able to stand when it comes simply because we take everything so sensitively that our flesh becomes our dominant factor in making decisions in every matter. In other words, we allow what people say or do to us to affect our entirety. Offenses taken are hardly relinquished without much travailing. If we take something as a gentle reminder as a sharp rebuke then I can only just shake my head at the notion of what our young people will soon go through.

[Jer 12:5] If thou hast run with the footmen, and they have wearied thee, then how canst thou contend with horses? and if in the land of peace, wherein thou trustedst, they wearied thee, then how wilt thou do in the swelling of Jordan?

We do not know what real persecution is, nor can we actually prepare for it. When it comes then only will Elohim supply the needs needed not just to endure through but to stand strong in Him throughout. In my walk it has always been by the guiding light of the Holy Spirit. Thus far He has led me and not once has He ever shown me the end of the road. He lights my path step by step so as I do not take the reins myself. Again I'm diverting. Offenses kill people. It takes just a small stone by the road that when we kick it causes us to stumble and fall. See what happens when we stub our little toes at the corners of a chair or a table, what pain it produces from injuring such a small member of our body. Carry little pebbles in your pockets and accumulate them. Soon enough, they will weigh your pants down and even you. Even so, offenses however small they may be must be dealt immediately or else they will subvert entire destinies that Elohim had planned for us.

Such a sad fate was Moses. He knew the way to overcome and yet as I read his story I can see that in the end all the offenses and complaints of the people were bottled up until the time came when he could stand no more.

[Num 11:14-15] I am not able to bear all this people alone, because it is too heavy for me. And if Thou deal thus with me, kill me, I pray Thee, out of hand, if I have found favour in Thy sight; and let me not see my wretchedness,

In the end, the offense caused him his entry into the Promised Land.

[Num 20:10-12] And Moses and Aaron gathered the congregation together before the rock, and he said unto them, Hear now, ye rebels; must we fetch you water out of this rock? And Moses lifted up his hand, and with his rod he smote the rock twice: and the water came out abundantly, and the congregation drank, and their beasts also. And יהוה spake unto Moses and Aaron, Because ye believed Me not, to sanctify Me in the eyes of the children of Israel, therefore ye shall not bring this congregation into the land which I have given them.

[Psa 106:32-33] They angered Him also at the waters of strife, so that it went ill with Moses for their sakes: Because they provoked his spirit, so that he spake unadvisedly with his lips.

Jonah exemplifies our generation in the regards to taking light offenses and turning them to heavy causes for death. This was after the kingdom of Nineveh repented of their actions and Yahweh relented of the judgement upon them:

[Jon 4:1-4] But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was very angry. And he prayed unto יהוה, and said, I pray Thee, O יהוה, was not this my saying, when I was yet in my country? Therefore I fled before unto Tarshish: for I knew that Thou art a gracious El, and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repentest Thee of the evil. Therefore now, O יהוה, take, I beseech Thee, my life from me; for it is better for me to die than to live. Then said יהוה, Doest thou well to be angry?

Things didn't go the way he'd expected it to go, so he got mad. In another word, he took up offense at Elohim for relenting from His word of judgement upon the people. How many times that when things don't go our way we easily put the fault at being Elohim's? How easy it is for us to prioritize ourselves over others and even the will of Elohim. The entire book of Jonah had one thing in common: all things, both good and bad; were by the preparation and will of Yahweh. Jonah's second time came soon after:

[Jon 4:8-9] And it came to pass, when the sun did arise, that Elohim prepared a vehement east wind; and the sun beat upon the head of Jonah, that he fainted, and wished in himself to die, and said, It is better for me to die than to live. And Elohim said to Jonah, Doest thou well to be angry for the gourd? And he said, I do well to be angry, even unto death.

For such a little thing as shade from the sun causes such a ruckus to occur from Jonah so much so that he wished he'd die there and then. What about us? What little foxes do we have that spoil entire vineyards? What little offenses do we keep that gives us the right to be angry at it, even unto death? A little spark kindles a great forest fire. It would do us well if we not just learn but truly to overcome offenses because they are one of the main things stopping our generation from progressing forward in the will of Elohim.

As I mentioned before, Moses knew the way to overcome offense but in the end he still allowed it to subvert his beautiful ending. He ought to have entered the land with the new generation I believe, but because of offenses everything for him went sour. There is another that endured immense hardship in his life but still he overcame it all. Unlike Noah who endured a patience of 100 years or Abraham's 25 years of waiting, Job's tribulation was the shortest but by far the most intense. Unlike Noah and Abraham who had at least solace and comfort in their families, Job had nothing and no one save a wife who tells him to curse Elohim and die soon after. But still he overcame. I'm sure you are familiar...

[Job 1:20] Then Job arose, and rent his mantle, and shaved his head, and fell down upon the ground, and worshipped,

So he worshipped. I'll end it here but I will be continuing soon on how worship links to overcoming offenses. And how Romans 12 fits not just as a verse calling separation but distinctly true worship as well.

-Wednesday, 8th March 2017, 1 year 6 months 1 day, 0354