Resting

I find now that time and even the atmosphere is getting much more quieter for me in the sense that though the sounds of everyday life is still there, the melody of harps, praying tongues, and the every now and then voices of those communally living with me in Glory Place and Semarak; it is as though I am being brought into a place where I find the most comfort alone with Yeshua.

[Mar 6:30-31] And the apostles gathered themselves together unto Yeshua, and told Him all things, both what they had done, and what they had taught. And He said unto them, Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place, and rest a while: for there were many coming and going, and they had no leisure so much as to eat.

I realise that this is exactly what is happening to me. Even as I am hearing and have heard that the lives of my brothers and sisters in Messiah are becoming much more busy than it already was, myself included; I find that there is a quiet drawing that has been graciously extended to me. I found that now is the time to cultivate the presence of Elohim in solace and solitude.

Don't get me wrong, we as the body of Messiah do need one another and to go alone with oneself makes our walks that much harder to walk. There is a strength in the unity of Yeshua's body, each doing what each part has been destined to do. And yet, and this is for me in this particular season; I find that I can take the most comfort and pleasure as I am by myself. As the work is being done by yours truly, as I drive back alone, even as I sit and have my dinner in silence I just feel so strengthened and comforted. But when I begin to interact I find that the strength I have drawn is flowing out for that time to suffice it.

This season is graciously given unto me because I have learnt that there is strength that can be drawn unlike any other when one is alone with Elohim. There is a glory that can only come when one is alone before Yahweh and not with others. Just like Moses, he alone was given the pleasure to see the glory of Yahweh like none before him. Although he had taken Joshua and the seventy elders up the mountain with him, Elohim only desired to reveal His glory to him alone.

[Exo 24:12-16] And יהוה said unto Moses, Come up to Me into the mount, and be there: and I will give thee tables of stone, and a law, and commandments which I have written; that thou mayest teach them. And Moses rose up, and his minister Joshua: and Moses went up into the mount of Elohim. And he said unto the elders, Tarry ye here for us, until we come again unto you: and, behold, Aaron and Hur are with you: if any man have any matters to do, let him come unto them. And Moses went up into the mount, and a cloud covered the mount. And the glory of יהוה abode upon mount Sinai, and the cloud covered it six days: and the seventh day He called unto Moses out of the midst of the cloud.

I can sense that despite every duty and responsibility given unto me in this time and season, Yahweh has extended that calling even unto me. To enter His presence, to witness His glory, to enter His rest and just be there. To draw a quiet strength from His presence for days to come. I found that for many of us we have our 'quiet' times. Times when we do nothing and just give ourselves entirely to the ministry of the Word of Elohim, which is good and something to be practiced. But I shall pose a question, what happens when you find yourself having no longer an opportunity for a 'quiet' time? It's not an 'if', it's a 'when' question. Because at the pace the Holy Spirit is working in and through every one of us, the work count will get higher and higher and more vast than we can imagine, encompassing nations about. If we say that we can only draw strength during our 'quiet' times, then does that mean we will be left without strength and help from Elohim if we do not have those times anymore?

One thing I've learnt is that a person may be busy and yet in his heart he is in a place of stillness and quietness with Elohim. A person may be sitting down, praying and worshipping and yet can be so busy in the mind. How to tell them apart? Just look at their faces, do they radiate stress when you look at them or a satisfaction that comes from the presence of Elohim?

[Isa 30:15-16] For thus saith the Master יהוה, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength: and ye would not. But ye said, No; for we will flee upon horses; therefore shall ye flee: and, We will ride upon the swift; therefore shall they that pursue you be swift.

Many a times we think that for many solutions in our lives, something must be done when in fact all solutions in our life stems first from entering the rest prepared by Elohim through Yeshua for us. As we desire to run swift without the rest of Yahweh upon us we will find our problems will be as swift if not swifter than us to overtake us. But as we enter the rest of Elohim, we no longer run per se but instead in Him we begin to move, to live, to have our being. What made Elijah run faster than the chariots of Ahab? Was it not the Holy Spirit upon him? How much more now that the Holy Spirit dwells in us that we can run and not faint? Many are fainting because many don't understand what and how it is to enter the rest Elohim desires us to enter into.

To enter the rest is not anything we can do, on our part is no effort except to believe.

[Heb 4:3a] For we which have believed do enter into rest

[Heb 4:9-11] There remaineth therefore a rest to the people of Elohim. For he that is entered into His rest, he also hath ceased from his own works, as יהוה did from His.
Let us labour therefore to enter into that rest, lest any man fall after the same example of unbelief.

I receive my help and sustenance while on the move because I understand that rest is not simply lying down and sleeping, true rest is from Yeshua. As we go to Him, He will give us the promised rest we so need and desire of to partake. Not just in the times we are physically still, but we can be about our daily needs and duties and still be ever so rested.

Anyhow, this season is for me. Most definitely. Something new is coming and I am expectant to just what it may be. Praise Yeshua.

-Tuesday, 9th May 2017, 1 year 8 months 2 days, 2335

Minister by Worship

When someone says they minister, it means that at the same time Elohim also ministers to that someone. When we draw near to Him, He too draws near unto us.

[Jas 4:8a] Draw nigh to יהוה, and He will draw nigh to you.

[Zec 1:3] Therefore say thou unto them, Thus saith יהוה of hosts; Turn ye unto Me, saith יהוה of hosts, and I will turn unto you, saith יהוה of hosts.

And when we draw near to Him, we enter into His presence by faith and by the Holy Spirit. For now, just picture the high priest. He enter by the veil into the Holiest of All and what does he see inside there? Nothing but the Ark of the Covenant and the incense that seeps in from outside the veil, from the altar of incense which speaks of intercession. The Ark speaks about the presence and the glory of Yahweh manifested and just like the high priest we too now, when we minister do enter that same glorious presence where we can worship and pray unto Yahweh in the liberty that Yeshua Messiah died to bring us into.

[Heb 10:19-22] Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the Holiest by the blood of Yeshua, By a new and living way, which He hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, His flesh; And having an High Priest over the house of יהוה; Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.

When we minister we are joined by one Spirit to be able to connect and minister to Elohim by the Spirit. And when we do thus, we are changed all the more. Whenever you come into the presence of Yahweh, are you changed? Do you feel recharged, refreshed? Do you experience cleansing, deliverance? Has something been lifted off or put onto you? Any changes whatsoever? Because one cannot but expect change whenever we come into the presence of Yahweh. If nothing is there, if there is no change; then it is simply ministry time and not ministering time. Because when we are in His presence something takes place and we ourselves will know it, whether we have joined together with Messiah or not.

[Rom 12:1-2] I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of יהוה, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto יהוה, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of יהוה.

We all want to fulfill the will of Elohim in our lives but to do that we must first know what it is. To know, we must be transformed with the renewing of the mind. And to be renewed, we must first offer up ourselves as a living sacrifice of praise unto Elohim to take over. I've mentioned partly about how this passage of Scriptures remind me of the Levitical burnt offering, the only offering where the priests have no portion in it whatsoever; all is given to Elohim. Likewise us as well, we are to offer up all so that we may receive all. Yahweh is not satisfied with the majority, He is only satisfied with the fullness that we can give with our giving up of ourselves entirely. On that note, the particular note I'm playing on ministering is about worship and its benefits to one who has truly experienced it.

Worship is likened unto ministering because that is what ministering is all about. The definition of ministering is to serve, to wait upon. It is to put Elohim first and foremost above all. And worship, at least to me; is just like that. When we come to worship together we ought not to bring our problems, our cares, our needs before others or even Elohim in that moment of time. This is about Him being exalted and not about Him meeting our needs though He is able. A habit of mine, is that whenever I'm on worship to always be half an hour early to the sanctuary, not to tune harps or whatnot, though I must sometimes; but rather to tune myself to the flow and working of the Holy Spirit. To just still myself and allow Him to take over the flow of worship. Men can sing songs, but its only those led by the Spirit who will worship.

[Joh 4:23-24] But the hour cometh, and now is, when the true worshippers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeketh such to worship Him. Elohim is Spirit: and they that worship Him must worship Him in spirit and in truth.

Does it not clearly say in Hebrews that it is only by and through Yeshua that we can only continue to offer up our praise unto Elohim even?

[Heb 13:15] By Him therefore let us offer the sacrifice of praise to יהוה continually, that is, the fruit of our lips giving thanks to His namel
Sometimes, we think we know what is best to flow into worship. What songs to choose, how long per song, but none of that is relevant before Yahweh. The Holy Spirit Who directs us is like the wind, we know not where it comes from or where it will go. Our job is to simply avail ourselves to that leading and flow together and not take the leading position, even if we are called worship leaders. The real Worship Leader is none other than the Spirit of Elohim and unless we can flow together there will be no real time of ministering, it'll all be just for show. Even as a worship leader, I recognise that unless I myself can connect with the presence of Yahweh present in every place then I cannot expect the congregation to connect either. If I'm being bogged down by burdens, weights, depressions, and oppressions, then that is exactly what I'm transmitting to the people: my cares, my worries, my problems. They want to see Yeshua, not me.

Thus, the half hour before worship is needful for me to clear out everything of myself so as to allow Yeshua in me to take centre focus. No matter what I've gone through, whether in the current day or in previous times, I've learnt to leave them at the door and just put on the Lord Yeshua Messiah because only by Him can we worship. Because I find that in worship, one can be so refreshed and changed that they only desire more of it as times goes by. Even as I write this, I had a dream prior to this. In that dream, and it was clear; I was worshipping during a prayer drive at night along some road in KL together with my father and Joseph from Vietnam. During that time in the dream, I just felt the presence of Yahweh come down and minister unto myself and I felt so refreshed. The dream ended with us heading back to a house for the night and when I awoke, I found myself totally refreshed.

Given that I have some duties to attend to in a few hours time writing this, I thought I would have needed more hours of rest but once again, Elohim has confounded me. All it takes is just to minister to Him and to believe and you will see the glory of Elohim. Such is the simplicity in the gospel of Messiah that one does not need to wrap his mind around how it is, he just has to believe and then he shall see. It's not the hours, it's simply Yeshua and then everything will be taken care of. Praise Yahweh.

-Thursday, 4th May 2017, 1 year 7 months 27 days, 0721

Minister to Him

Last Friday, the Holy Spirit really impressed upon my heart a question: What is the difference between to minister and to do ministry work? From then on, I really sought for an answer for it and day by day it has been coming unto me. And such a question was really by Divine timing as in a few days time I too would be sharing for the 1st service. Now that it's over, the sharing of mine I mean; I can now freely share it here without any constraint of time whatsoever. I found that the answers that Elohim had revealed to me, whether through circumstances or people were so vast that a half hour would not suffice to properly explain it. So, I begin.

What is the main difference between ministering and ministry work? Well, for one thing ministry work does not profit us one bit in the long run. Whereas when we first begin to learn how to properly minister unto the Lord then even our ministry work will be affected by it. Ministry work does not affect our ministering no matter how much good we've done, but ministering unto Yahweh affects our ministry work by the plenty. I also found that signs and wonders, healing of the sick and even raising the dead; all these miracles only extend so far into ministry work and does not actually contribute to our right standing before Yeshua Messiah. It doesn't matter if our prayers are answered, if we can raise the dead, cast out demons; these things are only the outworking power of the Holy Spirit in us. It doesn't mean that internally we are aright with Yeshua. It's a familiar verse:

[Mat 7:21-23] Not every one that saith unto Me, My Master, My Master, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of My Father which is in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, My Master, my Master, have we not prophesied in Thy name? and in Thy name have cast out devils? and in Thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from Me, ye that work iniquity.

We performing ministry work doesn't actually mean that we know Yeshua. It takes ministering to Him that we truly know Him for Who He is. Another difference is that ministry work is external workings whereas ministering, something internal takes place. Someone can be doing something good on the outside but inside their nature and character might still be bound to the course of this world. In fact, one can be so deep into ministry that they would actually miss the times of visitation from Elohim. Take Annas and Caiaphas for example. They were the father-in-law to the high priest and the high priest respectively and yet they missed the Messiah, they even aided in His death. You would think that someone who was in the office of the high priest would know when the times of visitation were and yet Caiaphas still missed it. He even prophesied about Yeshua but it did not profit him one bit, he was simply caught up in his ministry that he forgot to minister unto Yahweh.

[Joh 11:49-53] And one of them, named Caiaphas, being the high priest that same year, said unto them, Ye know nothing at all, Nor consider that it is expedient for us, that one man should die for the people, and that the whole nation perish not. And this spake he not of himself: but being high priest that year, he prophesied that Yeshua should die for that nation; And not for that nation only, but that also He should gather together in one the children of Elohim that were scattered abroad. Then from that day forth they took counsel together for to put Him to death.

Both Annas and Caiaphas missed it by a long shot. But that wasn't the case for Simeon and Anna, who were found ministering in the temple. They knew of the leading of the Holy Spirit and thus were directed by Him to meet the Messiah at His birth.

[Luk 2:25-27] And, behold, there was a man in Jerusalem, whose name was Simeon; and the same man was just and devout, waiting for the Consolation of Israel: and the Holy Spirit was upon him. And it was revealed unto him by the Holy Spirit, that he should not see death, before he had seen יהוה's Messiah. And he came by the Spirit into the temple: and when the parents brought in the child Yeshua, to do for Him after the custom of the law,

[Luk 2:36-38] And there was one Anna, a prophetess, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Aser: she was of a great age, and had lived with an husband seven years from her virginity; And she was a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served יהוה with fastings and prayers night and day. And she coming in that instant gave thanks likewise unto יהוה, and spake of Him to all them that looked for redemption in Jerusalem.

They knew how to minister and thus were always found in the temple, and were watching and praying until the coming Messiah Yeshua. To minister unto Yahweh allows us to tap into the spiritual realm where the Holy Spirit will have free reign to lead and guide and teach and mould us as He sees fit.

[Joh 16:13-14] Howbeit when He, the Spirit of truth, is come, He will guide you into all truth: for He shall not speak of Himself; but whatsoever He shall hear, that shall He speak: and He will shew you things to come. He shall glorify Me: for He shall receive of Mine, and shall shew it unto you.

Ministry work adds no benefit whatsoever to us except that it is an outward manifestation of what is inside of us. The way we handle the responsibilities given us tells of our character, one way or otherwise. It doesn't help to change our character but ministering unto Yahweh can. Another thing to note is that anyone can perform ministry work, only those who are truly His knows how to minister to Him. Not even many Christians understand, I realised; what it exactly means to minister unto Him. People tend to take it as another term of serving Him which is true in many senses but to be able to minister to Him means that Yahweh Himself has graciously chosen us. He's called us by name to draw near to Him and in like manner He will draw near unto us. One can be as busy as they are and yet still be connected to the presence and leading of the Holy Spirit throughout but at the same time one can be praying and worshipping but experiencing nothing, simply going through the motions. Just because we pray and worship doesn't necessarily mean that we minister, it takes preparation of the heart.

What is your mindset when it comes to different responsibilities? A pleasure that wells up from deep within, or a sigh of drilling fulfilling another part of yours as a helper or a staff even? Is prayer and worship a duty or a pleasure to you? Do you enjoy the hours you have been placed on for to actually minister to Him or do you count it as yet another ministry work time! From personal experience, it takes preparation of heart to be able to shift from one mindset to the other and not just anywhere but in the presence of Elohim itself.

Even the seventy elders that were appointed by Yahweh to help Moses in taking the issues of the people could not first perform their roles unless the Holy Spirit took them over as well. The apostles also realised that the thing that sustains the revival during the days of Acts was not their constant serving to the people but of ministering to Yahweh by the Word, by prayer continually. What more now?

[Num 11:16-17] And יהוה said unto Moses, Gather unto Me seventy men of the elders of Israel, whom thou knowest to be the elders of the people, and officers over them; and bring them unto the tabernacle of the congregation, that they may stand there with thee. And I will come down and talk with thee there: and I will take of the spirit which is upon thee, and will put it upon them; and they shall bear the burden of the people with thee, that thou bear it not thyself alone.

[Act 6:2-4] Then the twelve called the multitude of the disciples unto them, and said, It is not reason that we should leave the word of יהוה, and serve tables. Wherefore, brethren, look ye out among you seven men of honest report, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business. But we will give ourselves continually to prayer, and to the ministry of the word.

Note that before the seventy elders were able to bear the burdens of the people they were first to be filled with the same Spirit that was upon Moses at the time. And even the apostles noticed that the only thing keeping them afloat amidst all of their ministry work is first of all their time to minister unto Yahweh. And even for those appointed to minister to the people like Stephen was, they had to be full of faith and of the Holy Spirit and that took time to minister firstly.

Anyone can work the ministry work but without first of all time to ministry unto Yahweh, then eventually the ministry itself shall collapse like a heap. Because what sustains a ministry is not the many good things we are able to do and have done, even if they are signs and wonders accompanying; it is the Spirit of the Living Elohim and to allow Him to take over all that we set our hands to do because even the works that we ourselves do are prepared by Elohim Himself.

[Eph 2:10] For we are His workmanship, created in the Messiah Yeshua unto good works, which יהוה hath before ordained that we should walk in them.

[Phi 2:13] For it is יהוה which worketh in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure.

In fact, those who strayed from Yahweh, the people He has called by name who have tasted the good pleasures of ministering to Him; in their pursuit of other gods they have been cursed to no longer minister unto Him but to still continue to minister in the care taking of the sanctuary and to minister before men.

[Eze 44:10-14] And the Levites that are gone away far from Me, when Israel went astray, which went astray away from Me after their idols; they shall even bear their iniquity. Yet they shall be ministers in My sanctuary, having charge at the gates of the house, and ministering to the house: they shall slay the burnt offering and the sacrifice for the people, and they shall stand before them to minister unto them. Because they ministered unto them before their idols, and caused the house of Israel to fall into iniquity; therefore have I lifted up Mine hand against them, saith the Sovereign יהוה, and they shall bear their iniquity. And they shall not come near unto Me, to do the office of a priest unto Me, nor to come near to any of My holy things, in the most holy place: but they shall bear their shame, and their abominations which they have committed. But I will make them keepers of the charge of the house, for all the service thereof, and for all that shall be done therein.

The thing that separates religious person from a true believer of Messiah is simply because a true believer can and knows how to minister to the Lord. Anyone can do charity work, only we Christians have the privilege to minister unto Him.

Let me ask, what does it mean to minister properly? Let it be answered in the next post, Elohim willing. This has been far too long already.

-Monday, 1st May 2017, 1 year 7 months 24 days, 2128

On the Harp

It's not that I don't have time to write more posts but rather now my mind has been contemplating many things recently. Not in a way that puts stress on myself but rather just a quiet meditation about the things Yahweh has been teaching and showing me through different circumstances and people alike. But more than anything, it feels as though that He is drawing my attention once again to the harp to take a better look at it.

I know that the harp is indeed the choice instrument of Elohim and so it says in the Word and I also have known and experienced the benefits of ministering and just worshipping on the harp but since the beginning of this week it feels as though I'm handling something entirely different altogether. I'm not sure how to explain it but the harp has changed its significance towards me.

Just as I was having lunch today I overheard Joshua talking about the revelation of the harp. Someone who has the revelation that the harp is the heavenly instrument of Yahweh will handle and play it differently than one who just views it as an instrument. And that is true. I found it to be so alive to me yet again, as though everytime I worship and minister it is a new experience everytime. This week, I just really enjoyed playing the harp and even just hearing others worshipping on it. Just in the morning, when I was quite tired out i just sat next to aunty Florence in the sanctuary and just heard her playing it. It wasn't anything complex or sophisticated but just such a soothing melody came out and completely refreshed me.

Praise and worship became something else entirely to me. The more I minister to Yahweh, the more I found that it is easiest to just take it slow and easy into the presence of Elohim by the Spirit. Not song after song after song, though sometimes is good; but simply just to linger after a song has finished and allow the Holy Spirit to work as He pleases.

I found that now time is beginning to quicken even more rapidly than it already is, especially when I worship. 2 and 3 hours just fly by in the blink of an eye and yet it was ever so satisfying. Honestly, I am truly amazed at the work Yahweh had accomplished in me thus far in turning me from such and such a person to someone who really just enjoys harping for consecutive hours.

Praise and worship become my energy source. I found that as I worship more and more, the tiredness I feel in the moment disappears and new strength is endowed on me. I found that as long as I tap into the presence of Elohim, it doesn't matter how many hours of rest I've had. Just a quick connection will recharge me fully and that has already happened so many times that it becomes norm to me now. I found that the more I enter worship, the more my problems dissipate. I begin to see them as not my problem and that the solution to it all doesn't lie with me, it's with Yeshua. As I cast my cares on Him, He shall care for me and supply all my needs.

The week is yet to be finished and yet I have found myself at the place that Yeshua keeps surprising me. Teaching me things in ways I never expected and being able to connect with Elohim by the Spirit allows me to simply leave my worries and cares to Him as I just minister. I found that the power needed in ministry work is only found in the amount of time we take in ministering. Without the backing of a priest, a king had not much authority to command because the priest is the ambassador of Yahweh, His representative. In the same manner, us. Without time to just sit, worship, wait upon Yahweh, pray, just enjoy His works and creation; we will be heavily spent and find ourselves bogged down by so, so many things around and within. But if we make Yeshua our number one priority, we seek Him first; everything shall be resolved because He has thus promised us.

[Psa 66:12] Thou hast caused men to ride over our heads; we went through fire and through water: but Thou broughtest us out into a wealthy place.

-Wednesday, 26th April 2017, 1 year 7 months 19 days, 0425

Feels Like I'm Born Again

These past few days I've been at a strait for quite some time. My father and I just can't see eye to eye. Is this the work of an enemy? Rather in this new beginning of yet another season in Yahweh I'm beginning to see something being formed amidst all the differences in viewpoint and opinions. Messiah in me, the Hope of glory.

My father has been a great help to me in my walk with Elohim and though we may have had many a differences, we love the same Elohim and desire for such an intimacy with Him and with His Son, Yeshua Messiah through the Spirit. So, we walk the same path different ways and now I see that. You know, there have been many times in the past where instead of seeking the will of Yahweh for many things I instead sought the will of my father. I desired to please him more than doing what was supposed of me and that has really left me in many binds more often times than not. But now, with what Yahweh has been revealing to me since Resurrection Sunday; Yahweh has called me to Himself. And that has left me in a strait because knowing the nature of my father, he is always right. Even when he's wrong, he's right.

Please don't think that I seek to slander him. I really do love him but just as he has a peculiar way of showing his love for me, so too I him. I grew up not pampered but rather disciplined thoroughly by him and that has been a part of who I am now. But as of late, the Holy Spirit has been speaking to me about being born again. Many people say that they are born again, and they say well. But many don't understand what it means to truly be born again.

[Joh 3:3-4] Yeshua answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of יהוה. Nicodemus saith unto him, How can a man be born when he is old? can he enter the second time into his mother's womb, and be born?

Nicodemus was talking about the literal being born again but Yeshua was speaking about a spiritual rebirth. Just like a newborn babe, when we are born we carry nothing into the new world. Nothing of past knowledge, nothing of past pleasures, customs, cultures, traditions, and whatnot. Everything that we've learnt in the world we cannot bring into the kingdom of Elohim, not even beneficial values. If we are indeed born again then everything must start anew. And as much as we don't want to, we must because that's the prerogative of a newborn babe. They have no say in it whatsoever, they must start afresh.

[2Co 5:17] Therefore if any man be in the Messiah, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

[Rev 21:27] And there shall in no wise enter into it any thing that defileth, neither whatsoever worketh abomination, or maketh a lie: but they which are written in the Lamb's book of life.

But just being born again is not the same thing as entering and living in the kingdom of Elohim. To put it in a different way, to be born again is to be born sensitive to the spiritual realm. But to enter into the kingdom of Elohim is something only those born again can do.

[Joh 3:5] Yeshua answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of יהוה.

To be born again is like standing in front of your own house. You see the house but you view it from the outside. Those who are born again and are born of the Spirit as well are those who have the keys to enter their own house. That is exactly what it means that if we should live in the Spirit, then we ought to walk in the Spirit as well.

[Gal 5:25] If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.

Many Christians are sensitive to the Spirit of Elohim but many are not willing to give up whatsoever they hold onto to follow the flowing of the Holy Spirit. To walk together with Him is all that He really desires of us.

[Mic 6:8] He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth יהוה require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy Elohim?

You know, even as I write this all the angst and dissension I had for my father just disappeared once again. It is a blessing to be able to receive all things and yet to be able to relinquish it should the time comes. In this season, the Holy Spirit is teaching me how to hold onto nothing but Him. I desire Him now all the more that for everything He has blessed me with, the greatest perhaps would be His Spirit with me continually. Though I should err, though I might stumble, He is there to raise me up that I may live in His sight.

I may not show it much but I really am concerned for my father right now. I just happened to look at his face and it was horrifying. No real peace, no rest, and now he is seeking Yahweh but not finding Him just yet. A time of dryness has come. Of course, given the times of how I've been wrong many times I could be wrong this time as well. Nonetheless, there is a time coming for me, my father, for each of us. The time will come and is coming that we must be willing to relinquish all that we have unto Elohim or else there shall be no further bringing in. All we love, all we've learnt, all we can do, everything. Our Isaacs are about to be sacrificed and if we are not willing to surrender when the time comes then we shall surely progress no further in Yahweh.

[Gen 22:16-17] And said, By Myself have I sworn, saith יהוה, for because thou hast done this thing, and hast not withheld thy son, thine only son: That in blessing I will bless thee, and in multiplying I will multiply thy seed as the stars of the heaven, and as the sand which is upon the sea shore; and thy seed shall possess the gate of his enemies;

Easier said than done but now I've realised that this is a marvellous thing that I can see happening. Signs and wonders are taking place all around me every single day. I love my father, I really do. I just have a strange way of showing it. He seeks a breakthrough so in Yeshua's name, Yahweh give it to him. However to breakthrough you will need something or someone to break through. It won't be a breakthrough otherwise. But I'm veering off topic.

[1Co 15:36-38] Thou fool, that which thou sowest is not quickened, except it die: And that which thou sowest, thou sowest not that body that shall be, but bare grain, it may chance of wheat, or of some other grain: But Elohim giveth it a body as it hath pleased Him, and to every seed his own body.

[1Co 15:44-45] It is sown a natural body; it is raised a spiritual body. There is a natural body, and there is a spiritual body. And so it is written, The first man Adam was made a living soul; the last Adam was made a quickening spirit.

[1Co 15:49-50] And as we have borne the image of the earthy, we shall also bear the image of the heavenly. Now this I say, brethren, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of יהוה; neither doth corruption inherit incorruption.

Even as we might have known Yeshua in the flesh and carnal understanding of the mind, we no longer can.

[2Co 5:16] Wherefore henceforth know we no man after the flesh: yea, though we have known the Messiah after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we him no more.

[Gal 3:3] Are ye so foolish? having begun in the Spirit, are ye now made perfect by the flesh?

The road we now take is a road far less travelled. Everything about it is new to us and we cannot hope to traverse it unless we first shake off everything of the old life and being anew. That at least is what the Holy Spirit has been putting in my heart recently. I used to think that if I could become someone like my father, I would do well. But now I no longer desire to be like my father, my mother, my sister, anyone. I am Matthew Yap, and the road I take no one else in this world can. Such is the same for each of us. The only vision given to me is my Hope, Yeshua. Thus, I move.

-Saturday, 22nd April 2017, 1 year 7 months 15 days, 0116

Remembering Messiah

It's once again been a while since I had last wrote and perhaps now, on the way back to Semarak from CRC; is a good time as any to talk about recent tracks and activities. Many things have been happening and happening for my benefit.

This week is the Resurrection Week of Yeshua Messiah, and as the people called by His name we celebrate but more so remember what He had accomplished on the cross for us all. How He died such a cruel and lowly death but now is alive forever more and seated at the right hand of the Majesty on high. We remember, and we are humbled by it and by Him and His finished work on the cross.

In conjunction with this week, we of course had our usual staff and helpers corporate fasting and prayer for 3 days on absolute; that means no food and water. And for me this was an eventful fast because even on the first day Yahweh began to answer my prayers long kept up till this point in time. Knowing the significance of this week and in conjunction our fast happens in the same week as well, I prayed to Elohim for this fast to be unlike any before it. And it was, praise Yahweh. On the first day I was given a verse from Zechariah and it talks about how instead of the usual sullen mood fasting brings, the fast that Elohim ordains is joy and gladness, a continual feast.

[Zec 8:19] Thus saith יהוה of hosts; The fast of the fourth month, and the fast of the fifth, and the fast of the seventh, and the fast of the tenth, shall be to the house of Judah joy and gladness, and cheerful feasts; therefore love the truth and peace.

Just by this verse alone strength came upon me and I have received my help. For the remainder of this fast it was, to me; as though I wasn't even fasting at all. Such strength allowed me to continue my daily housekeeping and laundry needs and whatever else may be required. Not with sluggishness but with the same amount of vigour just like when one just had nourishment. And I got mine plenty from the Word of Elohim.

The second day, though in a way quite unexpected; another prayer long since prayed for came to pass yet again. I remember how I once told Yahweh to continue to break and humble me because I have an insane amount of pride and arrogance that I carry myself with. So, every time and every season there will always be something or someone that will come by and lay it down for me. This time, it was my father and truly the fault lies with me. Smack down. Anyways, I really received plenty when we had our talk and one thing I have noticed and am glad about is that whenever I get reprimanded sharply over something, the subject of the matter is always different. To me that is progress and why should I not be happy. A long time ago, I found that the best way to breakthrough and have a jump in our progressive walk with Messiah is to have someone in our lives who will not lay swelling words on us but will tell it as it is; even though it may hurt. And for that I have my family and a few others. Praise Yahweh for them.

[Pro 27:17] Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.

People tend to misquote this verse in using it for saying they had an argument without saying they had an argument. But that's not what the verse is saying. I realised that when a piece of metal sharpens yet another, both edges become razor. Meaning through they clash with one another both have benefit to it and they become sharper for use. Ought not that to be the same with us? We live in a community with different sorts of people from different sorts of background and upbringing, so clashes come with the territory. However I have learnt that in every moment we butt heads, there is always something to glean from it and what can be gleaned from those engagements ultimately will benefit us much more than if we should be all chummy with one another. It's the differences that make the foundation stronger. But of course, this sort of thing can be debated for many a whole but I'll leave it here.

The third day's fasting and prayer ended on quite the high note with ABC for breaking fast with. However, the real breakthrough was during the Friday Overnight prayer at CRC just now. I just felt that I couldn't worship, the more I pushed with the next song the more the presence of Elohim became distant to me. So I stopped after an hour or so, and we just entered into a time of prayer and waiting upon Yahweh for the next 3 hours or so. In truth, I realised that there is no greater way to remember Yeshua Messiah and His finished work than to be in reverential silence before Him and to behold Him as He is. Not with song, or sometimes even prayer. But simply just in the silence I sensed that the Holy Spirit is doing a great work in each and everyone there and in CRC itself. It was just serene and peaceful unlike the times before when the presence was so thick and strong, this time the presence was as quiet as a stream. It was soothing and time just flew in the blink of an eye. Surely Yeshua is enthroned this day in Kelana Jaya.

There's still the days ahead as we gear up for Resurrection Sunday and I can already sense that everything is falling into place. Even for my own part I see that everything is falling into my favour simply because of the Divine Favour upon me by Yeshua Messiah. The days and the seasons ahead hold great promise and more than just gifts, the Giver of said gifts is waiting for me too. Thus I receive and receive. What else do I need to do?

-Saturday, 15th April 2017, 1 year 7 months 8 days, 0410

2 Corinthians 3:4-6

It's been a while since I had last written. Mainly it's because now my daily routine has taken not a monotonic sort of setting but rather everyday it becomes the same. I wake up for morning devotion, although by the time you read the time that I blog this particular post; I probably won't be showing up any time soon. I worship since there is no one there even remotely, only a sparse few but that is not to say that I don't enjoy it. It gives me opportunity for some well needed ministering to Yahweh on the harp and in prayer during the morning devotion. After that, at least for these few weeks to come it is recording for the Chinese album and in truth, I have learnt quite a bit. Not just in the pronunciation of the Mandarin dialect but also how to manage the computer software for the recording as well. There is progress.

So we continue on and on until even time and then we break for dinner and rest for the night session at 8pm. More often times if I am not resting after the session is over then I'll continue recording again and this has been my daily routine for quite some time now. I don't dislike it, it feels as though whenever I record like I am on leave for the day. It feels so free and easy despite the amount of concentration and focus needed sometimes to record to such minuscule details. For me it feels as though I am enjoying not just a day off but a week off almost every single week that I am on the recording team for the upcoming Chinese album. Of course, I still have my commitments during the weekends: Friday house church and overnight prayer every week until 3am at CRC, Saturday GP service and every alternate week youth meeting where my sister, Megan and I share. Yeshua Heals and the 1st English service at night until early morning, flowing into the 2nd English service and CRC service as well. I don't get my reprieve until 10pm at the least but honestly for me, I enjoy the weekends. They may seem hectic for some but for me it is a given time where I can just drop my duties and just minister to Elohim like I'm supposed to.

Though right now my life may be full of much ministerial work, in the end my main duty is to first connect with Yahweh by the Holy Spirit and just continuously minister to Him whether in worship, in stillness, in prayer, in exhortation of the Word of Elohim. Any time, everytime that is my main duty as a son of Elohim. At first, I was completely swamped by the tasks given me but as I learnt more from the Word and from experience, as I just laid myself down and allowed the life of Yeshua to begin to flow, as I began to see that it is not my work but Yeshua's; breakthrough began to happen. The work though it became significantly diverse and arduous was no longer strenuous on my part because the Spirit took over. Everything became possible and everytime became interesting to me. Whatsoever the job given, it is not of me that I should churn out results but rather the effective working of Messiah in me that produces the fruit in its due season.

Suffice it to say, I am increasingly happy where I am now but that is not to say that I don't want more than that because I do want more than that. Not the works per se but the effective power of Yahweh working in me through all these things. The burden no longer falls on me to see it through, all has been borne by Yeshua on the cross and the only burden I need to bear is His own which is light and easy. Praise Yahweh.

Considering that many of us are also gearing up for the upcoming convocations later this year, I believe that though there should be a need to keep our sights on the end, we should not plan far ahead as we do not know what even tomorrow brings us. Yeshua called us to live a life free of worry. A life full of peace and consolation is our portion and not for anxiously fretting over what tomorrow will give unto us. All in all, Yahweh is teaching me to take and live and love each day as it comes because He made that day for us all. Ought we not to rejoice and be glad in it like the Word says?

We may have much to do but in the end, our sufficiency is from Elohim. Who not only makes us sufficient in things pertaining good works but also as ministers unto Himself by the Spirit. Because only the Spirit gives life.

[2Co 3:4-6] And such trust have we through the Messiah toward יהוה: Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of יהוה; Who also hath made us able ministers of the new testament; not of the letter, but of the spirit: for the letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life.

-Thursday, 6th April 2017, 1 year 6 months 30 days, 0423